September 28, 2007 11:41
Now In Paper-Vision: The Storm Worm
I have a piece in this week's Time about the Storm Worm, a remarkably clever, stubborn, well-maintained virus.
What I wanted to get across in the piece, and didn't really manage to do, is how incredibly weird the whole botnet phenomenon is. I mean, I've been reading about them for years, and I'm still trying to get my mind around the idea that organized criminals covertly control massive swarms of hundreds of thousands of networked computers located in office parks and dens the world over. Whoever came up with this stuff is an evil frickin' genius of the first water. Not that they've thought of anything all that interesting to do with them -- spam, denial of service, spam, denial of service. Would it kill them to fold a protein once in a while?
I wonder if viruses are just a temporary evolutionary anomaly anyway, depending as they do for their existence on large populations of uninformed Internet users. I mean, virus writers are crafty, but however they gussy it up, a worm looks like a worm. And people can't stay ignorant forever.
September 27, 2007 4:15
My Current Gadget Crush
This Iomega eGo portable hard drive. It holds 160 GB -- it swallowed my entire life's work and didn't burp. Yeah, it's also 160 bucks, so it's probably not the ideal bucks-to-GBs ratio. But it's such a happy red! And look carefully -- you can see it's curved, like a hip flask. It's a flask full of delicious data!
September 27, 2007 10:49
The Great Nerd Culture Gap
This is a subject my Spidey-sense is telling me not to post about. And yet.
Tuesday night I was a talking head on CNN International, a cable channel that is probably mostly broadcast at one airport gate in Dubai or something. I was on to talk about the Halo 3 launch. I was having a massive allergy attack and was even less telegenic than usual, but I did my regular, much-maligned spiel about how the video game industry, while comparable in size to the movie industry money-wise (this is basically true, depending on how you do your accounting, and has been for 7+ years), and increasingly mature as an artistic medium, remains largely invisible to the mainstream culture at large, even after the legendary "emergence day" moment of the Halo 2 launch, which brought in $125 million in 24 hours. Which has now been bettered by Halo 3's $170 million launch.
Once I was safely off the air the anchorwoman -- Christy, I think her name was -- turned to her co-anchor, shook her awesomely feathered mane, and said, "I don't know, I still think it's just people shooting aliens, Bob." Chuckle. "Coming up next: what you don't know about adorable puppies could kill you..."
Endlessly fascinating, the nerd culture gap. Generally speaking, nerds are from a demographic intersection that is historically privileged, even oppressively so: male and moneyed. But much of the country feels comfortable ignoring, if not denigrating, our culture. I keep trying to find a relevant historical comparison -- is it like the 1960s, the straights vs. the hippies? Is nerd culture the new counterculture? Certainly the borderline is policed from both sides: even though I consider myself pretty nerdy, writing about anything nerdish in Time, a ridiculously mainstream publication, I routinely get labeled an idiot and an outsider by gamers, fantasy and SF readers, etc. Which for all I know I may be (if I were an idiot, how would I know?), but the straight world definitely considers me a nerd.
Or maybe the nerd culture wars are over. Maybe after The Lord of the Rings, and Spider-man, and all the rest of it, nerds are mainstream, and there is no culture gap. Maybe Christy is now at the margins.
In other news, I just realized that Resident Evil: Extinction won last weekend at the box office. Truly, Milla Jovovich is our Gidget.
September 26, 2007 1:31
Really Long Space String Tangled; Etc.
The Russians had a good idea: put a spaceship in a low orbit, then lower a capsule from it on a 30 km tether, all the way back to earth. Step 3: space elevator. Sort of. It's not clear to me that the tether would reach all the way down to earth -- wouldn't 30 km be a really, really low orbit? But it seems like a step in the right direction.
Anyway, it didn't work. The tether, which is made of a very strong, thin fiber that kite-surfers use, got stuck on the way down and wouldn't fully deploy.
Also, Germany's getting a monorail^H^H^H^H^H maglev.
Also, filming has started on the Watchmen movie.
Also, the Sex Pistols got back together to re-record "Anarchy in the UK" for Guitar Hero 3. Wow. Says noted music news outlet NintendoWiiFanBoy.com, "The Sex Pistols recently rerecorded "Pretty Vacant" for EA's skate, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that they will do things they've done before, again, for more money, twice. And why not?"
September 26, 2007 10:46
Is Halo 3 a Geopolitical Allegory?
Just so that somebody has said it somewhere: The Halo franchise is the story of a Western-style human civilization locked in a conflict with an enemy chiefly characterized by its zealous and inflexible religious beliefs and its hatred and contempt for said Western-style human civilization. The Covenant have subsequently suffered an internal schism, to the point where its war with humanity has been complicated by a civil war.
The Halo series is, obviously, not an allegory for America's involvement in Iraq, or the war on terror, where America is the UNSC, the Covenant is radical Islam, and the Brutes and Elites are the Sunni and the Shi'a (or vice versa, it would be idiotic and wrong to try to map one onto the other anyway). It's a ridiculous idea that breaks down in any number of flagrant ways. Obviously the first Halo came out long before we invaded Iraq, and was conceived and planned even further back (I think it came out November 2001). And unlike the Iraqi insurgents, the Covenant have, or at least had, technological superiority, and they don't go in for terrorist tactics -- they're toe-to-toe fighters. And they're aliens. And they're obsessed with purple things. And on and on.
But you can't quite get away from the idea that Halo says a few things about the way we Americans view our place in the world. I'd even give the writers at Bungie credit for some prescience. Prophet of Regret, indeed.
(It feels weird to "read" a video game geopolitically, but then again, why not? If games are ever going to get the respect other media get, they're going be subject to the same scrutiny, and be "read" in the same way, as other media.)
(End pointless digression.)
September 25, 2007 12:25
Bad Blogger, No More Halo 3
Yeah, bit of a light posting period just now. Sorry about that. Should be back to normal soon. If you were me, would you be blogging right now?
I have been playing a good deal of Halo 3. I'm going through on Heroic, which I'm finding to be challenging, in a good way. It's not clear to me that there's ever going to be more Halo single-player campaigns before our sun becomes a cold dead husk (prove me wrong, Bungie!), so I'm definitely going to make this one last. In fact, on this trip through, if I don't finish a fight with sufficient panache, or if I miss a good angle, I'm going through and replaying it.
General impressions are good good good. Obviously. The fact that until now there wasn't any Halo at all on the 360 has been so wrong for so long that seeing it up there just makes some secret part of me relax a little. The graphics aren't destroying me and making me check my meds the way Gears's graphics did the first time, but then again, before I saw Gears, I'd never seen Gears. And the trade-offs Bungie made are obvious and correct: Halo 3's color palette is wildly diverse and fruity and candy-colored -- consisting as it does of hues other than grey and gold -- and its environments are massive. I don't think I've ever seen distance portrayed so effectively in a game environment -- the blurriness of stuff that's far away, the haziness of a Covenant dropship as it passes between me and the sun, on a high trajectory...it just hard-sells the idea that you're moving through a rich, real universe. Some levels I want to re-play, spending the whole time looking up.
And the lighting effects are gorgeous -- early on, when you're thrashing your way through jungle, you move through an overgrown tunnel and pass a bright white stripe of sunlight on the wall. It's not there for any reason, just to be beautiful. Nobody else would put that in a game but Bungie.
But this isn't a damn art gallery, it's a fire-fight. There's a very thought-through quality to what I've played through so far, as if somebody sat down and said OK: we need a medium-sized battle every 300 yards, each battle needs to last 5 mins, and there has to be three ways to win it. Go team! (Which is actually pretty much what they did.) Every fight mixes different vertical elevations, with enemies carefully placed throughout the battlefield -- so far there's nothing like the repetitive Flood levels of the first game. And the diversity and balance of the weapons is apparent all the time. You're never in a situation where you absolutely need a particular weapon to win a particular fight. If you like needlers, you grab a needler and win with that. This is the kind of stuff that doesn't register in screenshots: you're never bored in Halo 3, you're never punished, you're never doing homework.
I'm still not wild about the AI. I get that AI is hard, but I was pretty surprised the first time I met a Brute chieftain with a gravity hammer. Dude just hid in a little store room, bumbling around and getting hung up on boxes, while I tossed grenades in there with him, and pumped pink splinters into his furry hide. Then he finally came out to play, and yeah, then he killed me. But come on! That's not how you fight with a gravity hammer! You don't bumble around. It's a devastating close-quarters melee weapon! You scream and you leap.
What else? So far the writing (especially Cortana's opening monologue) and the voice acting are great -- I mean, if Bungie doesn't do that what do they do? And there are lots of great touches -- it's nice to see the grunts suicide-charge you with two plasma grenades once in a while, though a lot more touches like that would have been even nicer. I'm happy every time I reload my my covenant carbine and watch it exhale a toxic green mist. And they've given the Chief a nice animation for when he detaches the chain gun from its emplacement -- he sort of rips it right offa there, like he just doesn't give a damn.
The question that's still kicking around for me is, what are they gonna do with all this good stuff? Is Bungie going to show that they can tell an epic three-part story better than, say, Sam Raimi? That's what I'm still waiting to find out.
Oh, and my other question. I haven't seen it written up anywhere, and it's not on IMDB, but I'm sure I hear Billy West (of Futurama, etc.) as one of the Marines. Is he the David Cross of Halo 3? Was I wrong?
September 21, 2007 10:03
Halo 3: This Is What You Get
That is, this is what you get if you participate in the whole-hog, journalistically-ethically-murky Halo 3 promotional swagstorm. This morning I received this mailing from Microsoft in a box large enough to hold a small human body, or maybe a grunt:
(Sorry for the lame cell-cam photography -- the colors came out weirdly saturated.) I post this not to make fun of it, or to brag, or to publicly search my soul over whether I should send it back (It's not like Time is going to do that much more Halo coverage -- we already did three pages on Halo 3, pre-swag -- which I know isn't the point, but still. And I don't even know what "it" is -- haven't opened the regulation-army-green duffel bag yet). I post it in a spirit of awe at Microsoft's sheer thoroughness. I mean, that's my gamertag printed right on the duffel.
September 19, 2007 11:40
Prince Caspian Revealed
I am androgynous and unthreatening, hear me roar:
I hope this Ben Barnes isn't some kind of fantasy movie Jonah, being as how we last saw him in Stardust. Or more to the point, we didn't see him.
September 19, 2007 11:03
Can Anybody Take Down Microsoft Office? Probably, Yeah
I spent my high school years composing bad short stories in PFS Write. The first two years of college were lost to a monstrous Smith Corona typewriter/word processor hybrid. I finally got a Mac Classic in my junior year, and since then I have never been tempted to stray from the happy prison of Microsoft Word. I think of it as one of the "good-Microsoft" products -- feature-rich but not bloated. Sure, I've suffered through some brutal data-corruption incidents. There's been some format compatibility heartbreak. I thought it just made us stronger, Microsoft Word.
Now we're actually seeing some plausible competition, not just for Word but for the whole Office Suite. Google Docs has obviously been around for a while -- since August 2006 -- but yesterday Google added a beta version of Google Presentations, its answer to PowerPoint. (I've noodled around with Google Docs some, and found them to be solid and well-thought-through; certainly if it's a question of opening a document attachment sent to my Gmail account, Google Docs is the one and only choice, especially if I want to share said doc with somebody else.) Now IBM has just launched its free Lotus Symphony suite (word processing, spreadsheets, presentation software, no e-mail app). OpenOffice and Apple's iWork are lurking somewhere in the wings, sharpening their poniards and flexing their rapiers.
Now, I work in a corporate setting, which means I can usually walk away with a free and semi-ethically-acceptable copy of Office within six months of a new release. But if I were a small business? Or a student, for whom the $130 Office price tag is non-trivial? Or a more ethically upright human? I'd be aggressively exploring my non-Office options. Format compatibility is well on its way to becoming a non-issue. There was a time when I felt skeevy about doing mission-critical document-composing in my browser, but browsers are stable enough now that I'd probably start with Google. I don't see a way for Microsoft to win this one, except this: release a stripped-down Office-lite product for non-power-users, and make it free.
September 18, 2007 10:51
Cast Away: Star Trek and Harry Potter
I'm always fascinating by random casting tidbits. I had a brief stint writing Time's celebrity news page, and I always tried to make my editor run casting rumors that were unfounded and uninteresting and probably legally actionable. Now that I have a blog I can record the following:
-- Zoe Saldana, who seems to occasionally spell her first name with an umlaut and her last with a tilda, has been cast as Uhura in the new Star Trek movie.
-- Jim Broadbent has been cast in the small but crucial role of Horace Slughorn in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Broadbent - who's one of those actors whose automatically good in everything -- is rocking some serious late-life nerd cred, since he's in both Narnia movies (he's kindly Uncle Kirke) and Indy 4.
In other news, Philip K. Dick's daughter is surprisingly normal-looking. Here's her memory of going to see Blade Runner four months after her father died:
"I went with my mom and I remember that there were maybe two other people in the whole theater and that was the way it was everywhere -- the movie was a total failure," Isa Dick Hackett said. "I remember too that the lights came up before the dedication at the end, so I didn't even get to see that. It was like a double slap in the face."
September 17, 2007 12:50
You Weren't Getting Anything Done Anyway
Clink, clink, clink. I made it to level 11 before I hit YouTube for the walkthrough.
September 17, 2007 11:20
Robert Jordan, 1948-2007
I've poked fun at Jordan in the past on this blog, but now seems a good time to own up to the pleasure his pages have given me. Because I did read the first 8 books of The Wheel of Time, and for a reason: there are lots of good things in them. He hit on a genuinely smart and original magic system -- I was really taken with the whole idea of the Asha'man -- and I remember being particularly creeped out by his handling of the Waygates and Machin Shin. Anyway, RIP, and sincere apologies for the mockery.
September 14, 2007 12:03
Are These the Top 5 Cars Invented This Year?
I'm hip-deep in inventions that need to be sorted-through for the Best Inventions issue. So I figured I'd post a few and wait for comments, thus harnessing the awesome power of user-generated content.
I usually have a lot of trouble with the cars category, mainly because I know crap about cars. What can I say, I live in New York, we have good public transportation. We get dozens of entries every year, and after a while they all kinda start to look the same. They're hybrids, they're really small, they have three wheels, etc., etc., etc. Here's a few I'm looking at for this year. What do you think?
The City Car. It's stackable! But I'm not sure we can really say it's been invented yet if it only exists in the form of a rendering on Frank Gehry's hard drive.
The VentureOne. It's really really small and has three wheels. And a slogan: "Fly the road."
The MiniCat. It's like a miniature mini-van. That's two minis in one! And it runs on compressed air.
The Venturi Astrolab. They're billing this as the first commercially available electric car that's partly solar-powered. Which I'm all for. Though I think they make a good comparison between driving the Astrolab and sailing, which is that you'd only really do it when the weather was right.
The Saab Aero X. It runs on bioethanol. But I would never even start it. I would just stand in the driveway opening and closing the cockpit.
September 13, 2007 11:25
Star Trek: The New Voyages
Some things I am nerd enough for, and some things I am not. The million-fold wrath of Halo Nation notwithstanding, I am actually nerd enough to play Halo 3. I am not really nerd enough to watch Star Trek: World Enough and Time, a fan-produced episode that's part of the New Voyages series, which is basically a fourth season of the Original Series, with fan-actors playing Kirk, Spock, et al. Since they're not making any money off the show, Paramount lets them use the names and the ships and all that copyrighted stuff. "World Enough and Time" actually has an extended cameo by George Takei, as a future-Mr. Sulu.
I say that I'm not nerd enough to watch it. But I did actually enjoy it quite a bit. The premise is a Kobayashi Maru-style encounter in the Neutral Zone with some Romulans. Experimental weapon, ripples in space-time, huge explosion, transporter accident, etc., and suddenly Sulu and a fetching redshirt have spent 30 years in an alternate universe, while only 30 seconds have passed back home. Sulu then returns to the Enterprise, massively aged, with his alt-universe daughter, where he must save the ship from some funky energy field it's trapped in.
The writing is really pretty sharp, and the sets and audio are spot-on -- it's nice to see the old-style ship design blended with up-to-date (if homebrewed) CGI effects. The sound effects are perfect, and the candy-colored control surfaces are authentically weird. Yes, the acting is pretty horrific, except for Takei, who turns in a righteous, totally unwinking performance as Sulu-from-the-future, and the guest stars who play the fetching redshirt and the daughter. Scotty in particular, while exhibiting zeal and good will, has a hard time with his accent -- were there no Scottish Trekkers available? Though I have to take a moment to single out Bones's hair, which is rivetingly accurate.
But I didn't end up caring that much about the acting. "World Enough and Time"* is easily as well-written and -plotted as most authorized Trek episodes, and it's just kind of amazing that they pulled this stuff off as well as they did, with that level of commitment -- I mean, they even fade to black periodically, even though there are no commercials. Each nerd must decide for him or herself whether they (sorry, bad grammar here) can face the New Voyages. I can't say I'm sorry I did.
*that title is from Andrew Marvell's "To His Coy Mistress," which besides being an awesome poem also donated the title for Ursula Le Guin's "Vaster than Empires," and probably more SF and fantasy titles over the years. There's something about Marvell that just sounds like it should be space opera. "Time's Winged Chariot." "Deserts of Vast Eternity." I'm waiting for the Neville Longbottom fanfic "Vegetable Love."
September 11, 2007 12:15
The Best Inventions of 2007
Every year I'm called upon to help pull together a list of the best inventions of the year for Time. This is partly because advertisers like to advertise opposite happy uplifting technology coverage. But it's also hella interesting.
Lot of good stuff happened in green and ultra-low-cost technology this year. And of course we'll have to make room for the iPhone, and the $100 laptop. But so far the item I'm most charmed by is this: bendable optical fiber.
Corning's breakthrough is based on a nanoStructures™ optical fiber design that allows the cabled fiber to be bent around very tight corners with virtually no signal loss. These improved attributes will enable telecommunications carriers to economically offer true high-speed Internet, voice and HDTV services to virtually all commercial and residential (apartment and condominium) buildings. Current optical fiber installations lose signal strength and effectiveness when bent around corners and routed through a building, making it difficult and expensive to run fiber all the way to customers' homes.
Way to make something cool sound boring. What else cool got invented this year? Google Street View? The Boeing Dreamliner? This weird building made of water? The Matrix Goggles?
September 10, 2007 11:09
The Iron Man Trailer Is Up. No Crystal Skulls Involved
I repeat, the Iron Man trailer is up. Hooray for Shellhead. It looks good enough as far as it goes -- I have pretty much an infinite appetite for wry Robert Downey Jr. humor -- though there seems to be some muddling of the origin story (no shrapnel near the heart?) And I thought they might use just a little Ozzy in there. There was a lot of Ozzy. They really went all the way with that.
Oh, and the new Indiana Jones movie has a title: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Hm. Lucas does love those pulpy titles. Maybe they remind him of his vanished youth.
September 7, 2007 10:51
Joss Whedon and Brian K. Vaughan Talk Buffy
This headline is exactly the same as the headline on the article I'm linking to. You'd think I would've tried to come up with a different, new headline. You thought wrong.
It's basically just Whedon (the Buffy guy) and Vaughan (Y: The Last Man, etc., who's now writing for Lost, and doing an arc of the Buffy comics) talking about how they work, stuff they like, what it's like to write clever dialogue, and so forth. I don't quite understand how the conversation is taking place -- it doesn't sound like spoken speech so much as a long e-mail trail, or IMing. But maybe they really do talk like that:
When I was in college, I was belittling the woman who later become my wife for not knowing who Boba Fett was, and she responded by asking me if I knew who the Prime Minister of Israel was. Surprisingly? Not Mon Mothma.At any rate, they're very funny. One wishes one were as clever as they. But one is not.
September 7, 2007 10:23
Suddenly I Want to See Beowulf
It's because of this 'R-rated' trailer, which comes on a lot stronger than the original trailer, which made me wonder if I could really sit through 2 hours of Polar Express-style mo-capped Vikings.
The new trailer really doesn't pull punches. The violence is extreme, and much harder-edged than the balletic stuff of 300. You will see a dude ripped in half. (There's also a moment when some dude roars, 'Tonight...will be different!' I assume when this actually hits theaters everybody will yell "...we dine in hell!" Rocky-Horror style.) Philosophical question: if I see a digitally animated motion-captured Angelina Jolie with no clothes on, have I actually seen her naked?
p.s. Consider taking a moment to contemplate the increasing awesomeness of The Battle for Gobwin Knob. These days no webcomic delivers me more panel-for-panel satisfaction. GNNURM!
September 5, 2007 1:46
The iPod Touch: Now Entirely Phone-Free!
It's a timeless arc. We've seen it play out 100 times. (Is that about right? 100? How many keynotes has Jobs given?) Some solid incremental updates -- stubby new Nanos, with hard drives, new colors, video...ooo, ringtones, that's a no-brainer...
And then, yeah. OK. Now that is pretty cool. The big reveal at the Apple press event today was the iPod Touch, an iPod with that full-body touch interface the iPhone has made famous. It basically looks like an iPhone, but without the phone.
And yeah, I'm having that gadget-lust feeling. The touchscreen is great, of course -- I'll take it over the clickwheel, sure. But this thing has Wifi in it, too, and it runs Safari. You can do the pinch-and-squeeze thing with your photos. It's basically a scrappy little media appliance without the hassle of a phone contract. I'm not seeing the icon for that sweet Google Maps application the iPhone had (am I missing it? why would they leave it out?) but I am hearing that the Touch can do something the iPhone can't: download songs directly from iTunes, over the invisible ether, without having to go through a computer. Nice. And it's not a crippled version of the iTunes store, either, the way the iPhone had a crippled version of YouTube. It's the full monty.
At $299 (8GB) and $399 (16GB), this is quite a wantable object, and it shows us that Apple is capable of taking that touchscreen interface and migrating it to other product lines. I expect that that glassy black multitouch face will become as much of an Apple design signature as the candy-colored iMac look was, or the bone-white iPod. (I imagine it spreading stealthily over other Apple products the way the black Venom suit snuck onto Spider-man.) Touchscreens just make too much sense for Apple. And for the consumer, actually: they'll help slow down the runaway upgrade agenda that so many companies force on buyers. Before, when you wanted to add a new feature, you had to buy a new device with a new button to press so you could use your new feature. Now, since the interface is all software, your feature-set isn't as constrained by the hardware package. You want a new feature, you just download new firmware. Nice.
I do have one complaint. I use the iPhone as an iPod quite a bit, especially for listening to audiobooks. And when you have a long audio file like an audiobook, it's very tricky to jump around within that file with any precision using a touchscreen interface. Even a tiny twitch from your (or anyway my) fat, clumsy fingers corresponds to minutes of audio-time, so if you lose your place, or want to replay a passage, you can look forward to minutes of fiddling. For that particular purpose, the clickwheel was actually a more usable interface.
There. Apple quibble #22767 entered and logged. Now back to gadget-lust.
p.s. looks like Jobs has dropped the 4GB iPhone entirely, and dropped the price on the 8GB model to $399. I imagine we'll see some rage out of the early adopters, who paid $599 for an 8GB iPhone just two and a half months ago. I feel pretty bad for them. For about 2 seconds. OK, done.
September 5, 2007 11:05
The Tron Guy Is Getting Back in the Game
Steven Lisberger, who directed Tron, has another movie in the works. The bad news: it's not a Tron sequel. The good news: it's not a sequel to Animalympics either.
The pioneering writer-director of 1982's "Tron" has sold "Soul Code," a futuristic tale he penned at the instigation of IGN hostess Jessica Chobot, to Reliant Pictures for mid-six figures.Lisberger will direct the story of a tech pioneer who has perfected a way to download and transfer a person's memory. Script examines what happens when her memory is placed into a much younger woman's body.
Hm. Sounds a bit pervy. But it's good to see Lisberger directing again. At this point I would accept a Tron remake.
September 4, 2007 12:34
Virtual Earth Reveals Secret Weird Submarine Propeller
I was going to blow off this Slashdot story, but then, as if of their own accord, my fingers twitched over to this blog, which explained that there's a U.S. nuclear submarine with a top-secret propeller, and Microsoft's Virtual Earth got a pretty good look at it. Then I clicked on the actual Virtual Earth picture and saw why the submarine's propeller is so top-secret: it's really funny-looking. Seriously, it's like a giant sunflower back there or something.
Kudos to our government's various black ops divisions for realizing that it's far too late to pull the photo...
September 4, 2007 12:30
Harry Potter: The Real Epilogue
Courtesy of Achewood. "Hagrid, stoned out of his gourd, emerged from the house. He was playing virtual poker on his wireless laptop, and his robe hung open..."
About Nerd World
Lev Grossman
Lev Grossman blogs about anything and everything that could be plausibly labeled geeky--science fiction, fantasy, video games, comic books, tech stuff, and so on. If it could get you beaten up in junior high, it's fair game. About the Author
Matt Selman
Matt Selman has worked on eleven seasons and over two hundred episodes of The Simpsons. He currently serves as an Executive Producer. About the Author
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