Monday, May 12, 2008 at 2:36 am
Deleted Scenes From Iron Man
INT. TONY STARK'S LIMO - DAY
TONY STARK: Pull over... right here.
DRIVER: Where?
TONY STARK: At Burger King.
DRIVER: Are you serious?
TONY STARK: Didn't you hear me say the first thing I wanted after being tortured in the desert by terrorists for three months was a real American cheeseburger?
DRIVER: Yeah, sure... but Burger King?
TONY STARK: Yes.
DRIVER: Let me get this straight. You kept your heart beating with a car battery while risking your life to build a suit of armor with a built-in flame-thrower... so you could eat at Burger King.
TONY STARK: Yes. In fact, I got the idea for the flame-thrower while thinking about Burger King's great flame-broiled taste.
DRIVER: But there's an In-N-Out Burger just a few blocks away.
TONY STARK: I want Burger King.
DRIVER: Now that you're back, is the first car you're gonna drive a Chevy Malibu?
TONY STARK: What?
DRIVER: Well, that's like the Burger King of cars.
TONY STARK: Just order the cheeseburger.
DRIVER: Is the first girl you're going to sleep with Carnie Wilson?
TONY STARK: Order it!
BURGER KING EMPLOYEE: (OVER SPEAKER) Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order?
DRIVER: My boss, the smartest, richest, coolest man in the world, who can eat literally anything he wants, has chosen, as his first meal after being a held hostage by madmen in a cave in Afghanistan, a Burger King cheeseburger.
BURGER KING EMPLOYEE: (OVER SPEAKER) Is the first girl he's going to sleep with Carnie Wilson?
_________________________________________________________________
EXT. SKY OVER LOS ANGELES - NIGHT
Iron Man performs amazing aerial stunts.
IRON MAN: Jarvis, I'm starving. I'm stopping at that Burger King down there for a cheeseburger.
JARVIS: No need sir. Knowing your predilection for great American cheeseburgers, I've taken the liberty of opening a microscopic Burger King franchise inside your armor. As we speak, millions of nano-cheeseburgers are being injected into your bloodstream.
IRON MAN: Amazing. Can I get a chocolate shake?
JARVIS: Deploying milkshake enema now.
_________________________________________________________________
EXT. STARK ENTERPRISES - ROOF - NIGHT
Iron Man faces off against Iron Monger.
IRON MONGER: Isn't it ironic, that a man who loves Burger King cheeseburgers... is being killed by a man who loves cheeseburgers that aren't terrible?
IRON MAN: Damn you Obadiah Stane!
_________________________________________________________________
AFTER CREDITS SEQUENCE
Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) approaches Tony Stark.
NICK FURY: I'm here to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative.
TONY STARK: The Avengers Initiative? What's that?
NICK FURY: Burger King.

About Nerd World
RSS Feed
Daily Email
Recent Posts
Nerd World - TIME.com Archives
Blogroll
More TIME Blogs
Top Stories
- The Recession Is Made Official - and Stocks Take a Dive
- Mumbai's Fallout: Will India's Government Survive?
- Napolitano: A Safe Pair of Hands for Homeland Security
- TIME's 2008 Holiday Buying Guide
- The Press and Obama: Better Questions, Please
- A Blue Christmas at China's North Pole
- It's Cyber Monday. Will E-Retailers Have a Letdown?
- Thailand Crisis Deepens Amid New Violence
- Exclusive Mutual Funds Reopen for Business
- Barack Obama, and the Rush For Election Souvenirs
Top Photoessays and Slideshows
- Venice Floods
- 20th Century Britain in Pictures
- Pictures of the Week
- Mumbai Sifts Through the Rubble
- Two Days of Terror in Mumbai
- Over 100 Dead as Terrorist Attacks Overwhelm Mumbai
- Photos: The Kitsch of Thanksgiving
- Animated Movies: Not Just for Kids
- Photos: Anbar Sheiks Come Together
- Photos: Two Decades of Guns N' Roses
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.