June 30, 2008 4:54
Friend of Nico B.
Video Games are as much a drug as heroin or crystal meth, in that when you play them, you feel GREAT. I defy any to drug user to say the sensation of sitting back in your couch as that first game of Grand Theft Auto IV loads up doesn’t compare to a veinful of the finest black tar street horse.
Who knows if these games are really bad for you, but this much is true: playing too much feels like shifting your brain into neutral and gunning the accelerator until you smell burning metal. Hours of this super-revving cannot be good for your engine.
So, in a moment of clarity, I quit my Xbox 360 cold turkey. I unplugged my beloved console and all its components – controller, headset, games, and heavy power cord attachment thingy – and dumped them in the console graveyard, with my dusty, unused PlayStation 2 and a super-dusty, more-unused old GameCube. And I miss Liberty City already.
I would love to be what is known in the real drug world as, “a chipper.” That is, someone who can occasionally shoot smack without becoming a junkie. But that is not the case. With a great game like GTA IV, it’s all or nothing. I even found myself using the GTA equivalent of methadone – watching Grand Theft Auto gameplay clips on YouTube. But that path is not the road to salvation.
So, here are the steps I have taken in my attempts at recovery from this powerful addiction.
• I admitted I was powerless over gaming – that I was staying up way too late, then, later, unable to sleep because when I closed my eyes all I saw was exploding cars.
• I came to believe that a Power greater than myself – my wife – would kill me if I didn’t cut it out.
• By use of the good book – the Grand Theft Auto Cheat Guide -- I have surrendered my self to God-mode.
• I made a list of all my loved ones I had ignored – the movies in my NexFlix queue – and made amends to them. (Thank you for accepting me, DVD of Cloverfield.)
• I have renounced the lower companions of my former life: MrKillSplat, SilentButDeadly, BadEwok, Dooooooog23, and CylonSUKKKA.
• Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, I will preach this message to others who game excessively in the most powerful form available to me – a blog.
About Nerd World
Lev Grossman
Lev Grossman blogs about anything and everything that could be plausibly labeled geeky--science fiction, fantasy, video games, comic books, tech stuff, and so on. If it could get you beaten up in junior high, it's fair game. About the Author
Matt Selman
Matt Selman has worked on eleven seasons and over two hundred episodes of The Simpsons. He currently serves as an Executive Producer. About the Author
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Reader Comments (7)
For those of us still on the pipe, how 'bout some Diablo III announcement love?
Posted by Sean DeCoursey forgot his password | June 30, 2008 9:29 PM
I used to play countless hours in the past. Not so much these days. I went cold turkey on all forms of gaming for a 6 year period, until I jumped back to part-time gaming thanks to the Wii.
I only play up to a few hours per week (currently on Mario Kart and Super Mario Galaxy). The only exception to that is when I'm powering through Zelda or Metroid Prime. I usually devote more time to them.
And I still don't get GTA's appeal. Back in my junior high days, it was a toss-up between Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat. I preferred Street Fighter due to its varied gameplay and challenge. My friends always chose Mortal Kombat because of the blood and gore. I couldn't stand the game. It wasn't even the blood, but the poor gameplay masked by the gore. I don't know if that applies to GTA or not. I could be wrong.
P.S. Matt - I was thrilled to learn about Seth Rogen's guest spot on the Simpsons. I'm looking forward to his episode sometime next year. I also loved hearing about Dan Castellaneta's promotion to writer/producer as well.
Best of luck to you and the Simpsons crew.
Posted by Eduardo Jencarelli | July 1, 2008 1:41 AM
My name is Kemper B., and I'm a GTA-addict. It's been over two years since I last played GTA San Andreas. It's not easy being a recovering GTA addict with all the commercials out now for the new GTA and all the great reviews for it, but I've managed to resist it's siren call so far.
It's not easy. I miss the thrill of the car chases and running over random pedestrians. I can still almost feel the vibration from the X-Box controller in my hands when I was beating a random citizen with a golf club for no reason other than my own entertainment. (What?? Quit judging me! They were asking for it!)
But with the help of a higher power (namely Bioshock and Half-Life Orange Box), I managed to kick my GTA habit, and I'm still clean today. At least until I see it on sale for a really great price.
Matt, thank you for providing a safe place where we can discuss our shameful pasts.
Posted by Kemper | July 1, 2008 11:49 AM
Hello. I am a game widow. I also have to enact interventions for two children who would game until their eyes bled without limits. I live near a women who is unable to work because she played so much for so long she aquired carpal tunnel syndrome and now has problems caring for her children or her house. My ex lost a job due to his crazy gaming, calling in sick too many times and getting caught lying about a task he was supposed to have done at home. In China, Japan, and Korea there is a growing biz in treating people with gaming addictions. I am not making light of chemical drug addictions. I just state that this smack is real.
So you're taking the step of stopping. I wish you sucess. If you feel like slipping---
Think of all you will gain with these extra hours. More sleep. More sex. Heck, the grateful wife may even throw in somthing special. She is no longer waiting (or giving up on waiting) for you to get to a save spot in order to have intimate relations. She is no longer being awakened by an exhausted gamer coming to bed or being kept awake by his restless visions of exploding cars. She may even be able to watch an occasional tv show or movie with you.
You now have time to go for walks, real walks in HD with fresh air and smells. You can take up a reasonable hobby and control the amount of time you spend on it gaining valuable skills and meeting other people in realtime.
No more gluttony of the senses. You can enjoy your experiences instead of being numbed by them. And you can enjoy them with others, if you so choose.
If you make six months we will give you a chip with GA (gamers anonymous) on it. Maybe the game goes on forever, but we are finite and must make the most of it!
Posted by sscape | July 1, 2008 9:14 PM
mac video converter is an easy-to-use and powerful software which can convert video files from one format to another format and convert video files for Mac OS X users. It supports all video popular formats indcluding FLV, MPG, MP4, 3GP, MOV, AVI, M4V, WMV, etc.
Posted by goldstonesoft | August 28, 2008 5:20 AM
mac video converter is an easy-to-use and powerful software which can convert video files from one format to another format and convert video files for Mac OS X users. It supports all video popular formats indcluding FLV, MPG, MP4, 3GP, MOV, AVI, M4V, WMV, etc.
Posted by goldstonesoft | August 28, 2008 5:20 AM
mac video converter is an easy-to-use and powerful software which can convert video files from one format to another format and convert video files for Mac OS X users. It supports all video popular formats indcluding FLV, MPG, MP4, 3GP, MOV, AVI, M4V, WMV, etc.
Posted by goldstonesoft | August 28, 2008 5:20 AM