by Ana Marie Cox

Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum is receiving some, ah, blowback today over his decision to characterize the Iraq war in terms of a fantasy book about dwarves. Meeting with the editorial board of the Bucks County Courier Times, he implied that the war was a success because

"As the hobbits are going up Mount Doom, the Eye of Mordor is being drawn somewhere else," Santorum said, describing the tool the evil Lord Sauron used in search of the magical ring that would consolidate his power over Middle-earth.

"It's being drawn to Iraq and it's not being drawn to the U.S.," Santorum continued. "You know what? I want to keep it on Iraq. I don't want the Eye to come back here to the United States."

We understand that's the Santorum '06 slogan: "Keep the Eye on Iraq." Understandably, some have criticized the senator for reaching to Middle-earth for an appropriate metaphor (talk about "facts on the ground!"). No wonder we're losing.

In all seriousness, however, who are the "hobbits" in the metaphor? Americans? Marines? There is a "small community of midgets" in Fallujah...

Also, everyone knows that hobbits are totally gay.